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And lo, it came to pass that the 800 poster was feted in the manner of the peoples of the flame: glowing coals and ashes were cast about his feet, flaming gout's of phlogiston arcing betwixt heaven and earth while rivers of magma swirled with heart-stealing, unstoppable grandeur, laden with an irresistible intensity of purpose.

Skirls of ash and smoking ruin spun and danced, briefly, before the never-ending heat devoured their delicate patterns.

Yea, and verily all this was but a pallid and imperfect reflection of the promise of the flame in that dread poster's eye, his stentorian gaze searing the breath from any foolish enough to seek to match it, the sparks from furrowed brow promising an infernal essence of purest heat to all the many peoples of the wide world.

Verily, the peoples of the fire beheld the fearsome and smouldering mien of the dread 800:

rich with promises of immolation and pungent with the ashen debris of a thousand thousand lands it was, and so were the assembled masses stilled, silent, in awe and trembling.

And so it came to be that the immortal words were uttered, quietly, yet with unwavering conviction. And the words went thusly:

"Bugger - we've ended up with a right nutter here, lads. Let's chuck him in the old volcano, quick!"

Edited by Dix
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An asylum still exists?! I thought I had liquidated all of them as they contribute nothing to the (Forever) war effort.

Commissar, I am disappointed.

"In an hour of darkness a blind man is the best guide. In an age of insanity look to a madman to show the way."

"Even a man who has nothing can still offer his life."

"Only the insane have strength enough to prosper. Only those who prosper may truly judge what is sane"

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In an hour of darkness a blind man is the best guide

I think I'll use a torch...

In an age of insanity look to a madman to show the way

Unfortunately, we have them in sane times as well. They are called politicians...

Even a man who has nothing can still offer his life.

What if he's a brain sucking zombie?

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..and thus it came to pass, that as the ash of the holy celebration was blown from the holy text, that with it went the small but chameleon like frixas bug, which having obscured the text of the holy book ,revealed that it was in fact the 806th post that was holy not the 800th...overcome with bitter sulphuric tears the old monk poured melted crayons on his back. jumped from the towers window briefly shouting "806" flapping his arms as he plummeted to the holy Flammenwaffen factory below....

FROM THE SAGA OF THOTHKINS THE SANE.

Edited by mordenkien
pith.
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Commissar's Log: Entry #458872322

Have encountered a strange heretical pagan ritual being carried out beneath the pretenses of worship of He that sits upon his Golden Throne. Swift action was utilized to quell such vile prayer, and order was returned in a blaze of cleansing promethium. Commissariat action 10-70 was enacted on poster #801, carried out immediately. Poster #806 was thrown into a vat of molten syrup.

Addendum: One count violation of sector laws has been observed. Immediate response against poster #805 is recomended.

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Commissar's Log: Entry #458872322 Poster #806 was thrown into a vat of molten syrup.

I'm a Buddhist Civilian, not a post number!

..and thus it came to pass, that as the ash of the holy celebration was blown from the holy text, that with it went the small but chameleon like frixas bug, which having obscured the text of the holy book ,revealed that it was in fact the 806th post that was holy not the 800th...overcome with bitter sulphuric tears the old monk poured melted crayons on his back. jumped from the towers window briefly shouting "806" flapping his arms as he plummeted to the holy Flammenwaffen factory below....

FROM THE SAGA OF THOTHKINS THE SANE.

How can you do an autobiography when people follow you around, write it all down as you're doing it and publish it before you? It makes my blood boil it really does.

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As Commissar Pancakes is referring to people as posters, this would suggest that he is suffering from some kind of:

Posterlence!

If this is the case then everyone in this thread may be tainted with the touch of chaos and disease, from the Dread Carrier of Illness.

I would recommend nuking this thread from orbit, as it's the only way to be sure.

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mmm - but having been judged by the Commissar, I no longer bask in the glow of righteousness. Therefore I am in perfect position to send forth the flaming syrups of justice, and let slip the fearsome pancake toasters of war!

(The Flaming Forks Of Justice brigades will follow up with the coup de grace. Coffee and crumpets to follow.)

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Hah - as an unjustly judged former (maybe) loyal citizen, you can have your flickering ember of an Emperor. We heretics have our toasty warm English breakfast goods and molten caffeinated drinks of deepest sugary night.

Plus, we get to wear funky leather & chrome outfits and sunglasses at night, and play with stolen illegal weapons like the legendary Flamwerfer prototypes created by Chris, before he banned them in fear of their power :)

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